Tired!!!

Yesterday we went to the hospital and Brody had to check his bloods and level of meds, also he had to go under for a CT scan and a Bone Marrow. The CT scan is to check how the infection is going and the bone marrow is what Luke will have but Brody has once and that is to check how the cancer is going. All of these things can delay the transplant if they are back or not at a good level. Results hopefully next Monday!!!

We got to the hospital and got his bloods done, then waited and waited and waited. Until Brody and i was sick of waiting anymore. I went up to the desk and asked what was happening. All i was told it should be soon. So we waited and waited more out in the hall way, as Brody still has a runny nose and he cant be in with the other children in the waiting room. Finally a nurse come and did everything she needed to. But we still waited and waited, after over 5 hours we finally got in and they did the CT and bone marrow. Brody then had to wake up from his sleep, so we got home after 7.00pm. What a day!!!

The long waits are very hard, as Brody ran off once and i lost him, he touches everything, and gets frustrated and angry. Its also very hard to keep him occupied, i take a big bag of stuff like DVD player, DS, cars, colouring and toys. But its hard for Brody to do these things in a hall way with noises, people walking past, other people waiting out there.

The positive thing from yesterday experience is that i got to spend some quality time with Brody but wish it wasn't with me saying no, or don't touch that or stop running around and running off. This whole experience makes you very emotional and its like riding a roller coaster as your emotions go up and down within minutes.

I try and be positive but as all you have to do is sit and think thoughts and your emotions are playing games the negative side always pops in. Its my love for Brody that keeps me going. Mothers that have lost a child or have a child in this same situation are the only ones that know how i am feeling. No one understands the heartache, the frustrations, the pain, the worry, the torture this experience brings. I am just glad Brody has Autism and is young as he still thinks he is not sick and finds it hard only when we are in hospital.

On a happy note, Brody loves running around the house as Iron man, and is so stuck on it that he wears it every day. Thanks to Bill as next time he is here he can play superhero's with Brody as he makes us wear a mask and run around with him. LOL